My bookie outfit–it’s all about the clothes, ya know.
The Oscars are over—and so is my gig as a bookie. I shouted, “You’re a loser if you don’t play!” and let the betting go on until the first heel hit the red carpet. We ended up with a cash pot of $230.00, which my cousin-in-law Bob won. Don’t even think it or I will have to send my Dobergirls over to give it to you straight—Bob won fair and square with 17 correct answers. It’s rumored that while he did not see all the movies, his picks included anything with a universal God in it. Did I mention Bob is a dad and stepdad to six kids, a math teacher, a coach, and preacher?
Most of the players met and wrapped up on Monday night on Facebook. A virtual post-Oscar party that included virtual Champagne and hors d’oeuvres was held. (Someday soon I will tell you about the insomnia parties we host on Facebook…) Anyway, Bob graciously accepted his cash and thanked us all for fattening his wallet. His acceptance speech is below.
Next time—and there will be a next time—I hope you will play with us because…“you’re a loser if you don’t play!”
Do you like to gamble?
Bob’s Acceptance Speech:
Oh my, oh my God. Oh wow really, really, really, really, really, truly wow. Thank you so much to the Academy this is insane. This is an extraordinary honor. I’d like to congratulate my fellow nominees… choosers, gamblers, I’m afraid I have to warn you that I’m experiencing stirrings. Somewhere in the upper abdominals which are threatening to form themselves into chunks of vomitous spew, or maybe just a few dance steps. I want to thank everyone who made this night possible.
To my parents who conceived me at the drive in movies and birthed me into this world, giving me this marvelous opportunity to compete among some of the most knowledgeable and studious of competitors. I have truly “f-ing” learned so much from all of you. I also could not have reached this pinnacle of luckiness without my honkey’s Dicky and Micky, where my quacker? Is he up there? Dicky’s out there somewhere mate, eh mate? You’re the best. You’re the best. I can’t wait, and listen. He’s had a wonderful story and I can’t wait to see the next chapter of this story, so I can win the f-ing money again next year, you know? If you wanna, if you wanna be a champ, if you wanna get trained and learn how to select better picks, then go meet with him. Dickeklund.com, go do it. Check him out, ok. Alright, he deserves it.
And of course mostly, my wonderful wife, Sniff, sniff, I didn’t think I was like this. My wonderful wife who’s my mast through the storms of life, I hope I’m likewise to you darling… uhm, my spouse… yeah, you… what’s your name over there. Sniff, sniff, I’m crying more now because I’ve just embarrassed myself and shamed her in front of millions. Oh well, F***-it”. Who gives a crap anyway? And finally to our Bookie, the wonderful blog writer herself Katybeth and her incredible assistants who assisted her in finalizing the votes. Without them, there would be no reward for all the hard work we put in watching every one of those boring documentaries and the countless hours of study, conversation and contemplation we all put into making this honor possible. Thank you, thank you so very much.