Do you like to cook? And by “cooking,” I mean deciding what to eat, buying it at the grocery store, preparing it, dining on it and cleaning up? Do you make menus and plan ahead? When I was growing up, my sweet mother made a week’s worth of menus and shopped on Monday for the entire week. I never, ever remember her running out to the grocery store in a panic at 4:30 p.m., wondering what we would eat for dinner. No surprise—when it comes to cooking, I am not like my sweet mother…although as I type, I do have a pot roast in the crock pot. So there.
The next two reviews are all about cooking. Yes, I know that I said I wasn’t going to group items together, but for this review I am exercising my option to be a little OCD from time to time.
The top comfort foods consumed by Americans (according to food critics) are: ice cream, pizza, hamburger, chips, biscuits, French fries, spaghetti, chicken soup, fried chicken, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, grilled cheese, peanut butter and yogurt. Did your comfort food make the list?
Submission number one is for a pot. But not just any kind of pot—A BLUE POT. Submission number two is a cooking gadget I had no idea existed until its owner submitted it to ODD REVIEWS as an item that is near and dear to her heart. Now, of course, I am wondering if I can go on without one.
If your curiosity is suitably stimulated, we can move forward.
Submitted by: Anne
Reviewed By: Everett Possum
A pot. Hmmm. There are several ways I can take this. This pot can represent several things. One reference is that you like to get high. Smokin’ the weed? Burning some pot? No judgment here, dear reader. Burn on, Bob Marley. The most obvious reference is that you like cooking. This does not exclude the prior reference, in fact usually one follows the next. Regardless, cooking is enjoyed by many and eating is enjoyed by most everyone (except those suffering from bulimia). The more obscure is usually the more true though. For me this person likes life. They take a bit of this and a bit of that and throw it into the pot of life and simmer. Out comes a wonderful stew – some bitter, yes, but mostly rich and hearty. Those who cook usually take good things and make them better and sometimes better for you. I’d like to think that this person does the same in the lives that they touch.
Reviewed By: Barbara Ganush
LeCruset! It looks like a five quart Dutch oven, cast iron, good for making a hearty stew or a delicious pot roast. An adventurist cook would definitely create a mouth watering coq-au-vin in this. Only a true cook (dare I say chef?) would put a piece of cookware as the thing that makes them happy and represents the real them. I’m betting that this person is a nurturer, a caretaker, and a damn fine cook. However they are also a lover of nice things and willing to pay for quality. They are not going to take a chance on sub-standard or off brands. They like things that are tried and true, just like they are.
Submitted By Joann
Reviewed By: Al Dente
Now we’re cooking! With infrared radiation . . .
I love technology as much as the next person. I think it’s pretty neat that phones can be used as encyclopedias and jukeboxes and that laser surgery isn’t just on Star Trek any more. Some things however, we’re okay on. As I have written before, though maybe not to you, I will use the example of soap. We used to buy cakes of the stuff. Then, moving the bar become “a hassle” so we developed a liquid soap. “Do we really need this”, I asked at the time. Now we have soap that comes out as foam. FOAM! Are we so lazy that we can’t develop lather from liquid soap?
This brings me to this oven. Conventional ovens brought on convection ovens. These led to microwave ovens, toaster ovens, and even more absurd special things just to cook bread. Now yet another way to cook food. Never mind curing cancer, lets keeping working on ovens. Maybe we could find a new way to cook, but do we need it?
Dear readers, I do not doubt that this is a wonderful item. I prefer to think it represents a person who is constantly looking at things and saying maybe I can do better. That is a noble sentiment and worthy of our admiration. After all, Ben Franklin was famous for keeping a weekly score to see which virtues he was excelling at and which ones he was falling short on. Apparently random sex with many anonymous partners was considered a virtue at the time, and he consistently score high in that field, but overall he noticed that when he focused on one virtue, another virtue suffered. The lesson was, we cannot do everything. With that thought in mind I urge you all to focus less on the ovens of the world, an area I consider well covered, and to focus more on hunger on a larger scale, or world peace, or the elimination of ATM fees. You know, the big world problems.
Reviewed By: Chef Boyar Ubusy
This picture answers so many of life’s burning questions. For a long time I’ve wondered who watches infomercials. Who actually buys this stuff? Does the advertised product really work like they say it does? Now I have my answers. Truthfully, I am an avid infomercial watcher. I find them to be like an episode of Jerry Springer. I couldn’t be more uninterested yet I can’t turn it off. I have seen the Nuwave. It promises to cook food in a fraction of the time of a conventional oven while retaining all of the flavor and juiciness. If I’m not mistaken it will even cook food that is still frozen.
Seeing as this person sent this item as the representation of who they really are, I’m going to guess this is a busy person. One who does not have time to think about an plan menus for the week. One who often leaves the house in the morning without even thinking about dinner until they arrive home late in the evening. (So its probably also a skinny person, since I think about food all day long!) They get home after a long day, haul out the Nuwave and prepare an excellent meal for the family. They can bring home the bacon AND fry it up in the Nuwave!
My pot roast smells really good, in case you were wondering – check this out, the recipe is amazing. Thank you for all the terrific, real me submissions, and to our clever and witty reviewers. Stay tune for more reviews! Coming soon to an Odd Blog in your neighborhood.
Odd Loves Company,
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