Memories Over the holidays, Cole and I were pulling the three (yes, three) toddler-size elves out of their storage boxes when one of, Dearly Departed, Joe’s index cards came out of the last elf’s box. The handwritten note card was titled “Silence” and featured a quote by Kafka. I remarked to Cole that his dad … Continue reading Make Lots Of Memories
Cole suggested we visit his grandparents (Joe's Mom and Dad) at the cemetery and spread some of Joe's ashes and so we did....taking our good friend Johnny with us (see below) Four Years Gone, Forever missed..... ~ Gossip was so much fun to share with Joe. I heard some great gossip a few weeks ago and … Continue reading Four Years Gone, Forever Missed
Joe- Hindsight-Christina Taylor Green Friends and I were talking the other day about Christina Taylor Green, the 9-year-old shooting victim who was killed in the Tucson Safeway grocery store by the Tucson shooter. John and Rosanna Green have been criticized for appearing on Dateline 24 hours after their daughter’s death. They have also been on … Continue reading Joe-Grief in Hindsight-Christina Taylor Green
This second Christmas without Joe is harder than the first. The numbness has worn off. Cole and I are keenly aware that we are now a family of two. We have kept our holiday traditions, but every single one is different without Joe. Every year, Joe and Cole would trot off to buy a Home … Continue reading Our Holidays Got Different
Thankful for Traditions! Joe and Cole used to prepare the Thanksgiving meal every year. Cole started learning to stuff a turkey when he was three, while being tutored in the finer points of gravy making. I was in charge of setting the table, making sure we had a dish with a lid for each dish, … Continue reading Thankful for Traditions
On November 20, 2010, my friend Cheryl died of cancer. Cheryl knew everyone. EVERYONE. We would stand in line at a movie theater, and she would immediately start talking to the person behind or in front of us. Within 5 minutes, Cheryl would have connected the person in line with someone else that they both … Continue reading Cheryl Knew Everyone!
Waldorf education encourages parents to let children “wonder” and not provide factual answers too soon. If a four-year-old asks how water comes out of the kitchen sink, we might smile and say “I wonder,” and the child can then come up with all sorts of creative and imaginative answers. We can play along. Perhaps, there … Continue reading Wondering about Death
“Do you still miss Joe?” This question hurt. I took a deep breath and answered, “All the time.” “Oh, well, you seem fine.” I miss Joe. Cole misses his dad. We are fine. We travel onward while missing Joe; resisting, staying stuck at the “missing Joe” portion of the journey. We feed memories, good and … Continue reading Do You Still Miss Joe?
Cole’s braces went on this week. Joe had a big gap between his front teeth that he was very proud of, and could never understand why someone would want to wear braces. Joe was Odd. Braces hurt for a day or two after they are put on, and Cole experienced the usual pain. I offered … Continue reading Holding Your Breath~Letting It Go
The other day I wrote a blog post questioning if Cole and I wanted one more day with Joe. I was both touched and astonished by the number of follow-up comments. Here are a few of these gems of insight polished by the grit of sorrow: Look for evidence that you did things right: One comment … Continue reading Gems Of Insight polished by the Grit of Sorrow