Thank you to all my Odd family Members who contributed to Odd’s collection of Limericks in honor of Edward Lear’s Birthday.
There once was a doggie named Melle
She was truly the canine from hell
She ruined the house and the yard
and would bite everyone in sight
What became of her I simply won’t tell.
~ Marcie Jensen
There once was a lad from old Erin
Who didn’t take care of the shorts he was wearin
He ripped a hole in the seat, the boys came out to greet
And he sent all the ladies atearin’
We sit in Chicago in May
Watching Spring as it comes out to say
“You’ll forget about snow,
And the Twenty below…
When humidity checks in and…stays,
Once a woman decides on a guy
He’d better just give up and sigh
For the road to perdition
Is his full price admission
Unless God takes him up in the sky
Said the kilt wearing husband of Phyllis,
I think I know just what this pill is…
Viagra works neat!
So she jumps off her seat!
And said, “Whatchoo talkin’ bout Willis!
A cave in the deep Himalayas
Was the home to a Zen dude by daya
But by night he rocked on
With the girls from Bayonne
Now his robes are embossed with “Da Playa”
There once was a bank, name of Chase
They lied while they laughed in your face
Their automated calls I hate
Can’t get a good interest rate
Too bad all my monies in that place!
Couldn’t wait to get an iPhone, shiny and new
Can’t believe all the things it can do
They get you hooked on their apps
Books, games, camera and maps
Now if I could just get a call to go through
Oh how time passes so fast
Don’t blink because nothing will last
You think they’ll always be small
But they grow up so tall
Hopefully all the good times aren’t past.
My God how I hate the beach and the sand
The sun, the fishermen and the slope of the land
The waves salty, the sun hot
The oils smell good but they’re not
And the seagulls overhead shit where you stand
Little Miss Muffet, sat on her tuffet
eating her curds and whey,
when along came a spider,
who crawled up inside her,
and now, she giggles all day!
~ Meira Frankl
Mary had a little sheep,
and with the sheep, she went to sleep.
Sheep turned out to be a ram,
so Mary had a little lamb!
~ Meira Frankl
I would love it if you would contribute an original or favorite Limerick to our Odd library of limericks!
33 thoughts on “Limerick Contributions by My Odd Family!”
Love these Limericks. You need to write an Odd book of Limericks! So funny. Wish I could contribute but my lines never rhyme.
These are so great. I wish I was poetically gifted or bent–not exactly sure which these would follow under. Can you do it again?
Have a great day!
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Excellent limericks! Wish I had the talent to write anything poetic or rhyming, so instead I’ll just have to enjoy what everyone else offers.
Antoinette was very neat,
from her head unto her feet,
She likes her sweets and music too,
but most of all she likes her facebook crew!
There once was a woman named Nancy
her bed and linens were fancy.
She laid in her bed, and took all her med’s
until she was very antsy!
I think I am one line short of a limerick but I just cannot think on pain med’s.
@ Hawk is amazing! Sheesh!
There once was a man with a kilt.
Who wore no undies with silk.
His passion it seems was to fly with his dreams,
and his heart had a bit of a lilt.
Oh how funny. Truly a limerick from Limerick!
These are so much fun.
There once was a creep named bin Laden
Who was evil disgusting and rotten.
The Navy Seals found him,
And with one bullet downed him,
Now America’s avenged and applaudin’.
There once was a girl named Lindsay
Who drank and did drugs with a frenzy.
She stole a necklace then claimed,
She couldn’t be blamed,
But the judge thought her story was flimsy.
Happy Limerick Day!
Love this one!
Katybeth did not like to cook.
She hid a Coke in every nook.
She liked her chips and candy too
she likes the ponies and the books
and no she never was a crook!
Did you ever have to leave your pup?
And wonder if he was safe & stuff?
Try this camp to ease your fears.
Camp-run-a-pup isn’t gruff or mean,
It’s run by a Mom and a teen.
There once was a lady named Katy
Who wrote “El Morno” on her Facebook page daily
With a Starbucks in her hand
She says isn’t life grand
And we get to read about her “Odd Family”
A woman who’s last name was Newell
Considered by most a beautiful jewel
Was not very old and loved rock and roll
And her daughter just graduated from school
(and one for TCN)
There once was a boy named Cole
His hair he had stole off a troll
It was, curly and wild
On his head it was piled
His hairdresser just couldn’t make parole!
(with coaching surrounded by inspiration—I am catching on…..)
There was a developer named Trump
Who’s ego was in need of a bump
So he jumped in the fray, had his ridiculous say
And in the end was exposed as a chump.
Now this is a great limerick!
There once was an Uncle named Jed
And a hillbilly family he led.
He shot in a ditch, oil made him rich
Old Jed was a “somna” bitch.
(in reference to a Beverley Hillbillies thread…)
There once was a governor named Rod
Who thought he was a Tsar or a God
When the Feds made their case
You’d think he’d lose face
But he keeps babbling on ..what a fraud.
There once was a lady named Jensen
Who was not related to Jim Henson
But on facebook anyway
She entertained us each day
And rid us of all of our tension!
Wow, lots of talent on this blog!
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Marcie Jensen what a treasure,
took on ballet with all it’s pleasure.
With grace and ease an Arabeque
moved onto Dressage to Pirouette,
a master at a trot and canter,
she awed her fans with pure delight, in her day she was a sight!
Even now she works and trains, to lead her trinkett onto fame!
Too long for a limerick but I couldn’t leave out the dog training!
A woman who I like to call KB
Says “Yes!” or “No!”, rarely “Maybe. . .”
So if you are game
Give her the same
’cause that is the fun, yeah baby!
Some great work and words you have posted, With limericks and rhymes you are the mostess, I could not resist to be part of this list, thank you KB our Hostess.
I am not going to respond to each comment but applaud loudly and Woo Hoo for each and very one you!
Nancy, I loved your limerick. Thank you!
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