Ten years ago

Many of you noticed that while the light was on – Odd’s front door was stuck. Thanks for letting me know and welcome back! The door is open. We still need to fix a few things in the basement but come on in and meander around to your heart’s content. I’m happy you are here even when I’m not.

We have a lot to catch up on. And since I dropped by to clean up Odd’s technical difficulties, I’ll start.

Dearly departed Joe died ten years ago today. A million years ago and yesterday. Cole and I found a painful memory last night as we drove to dinner. Most of our dead dad/Joe memories begin on the day he died. Makes sense, right? But last night remembering the night before Joe died became important. Thinking back, we remembered that Joe picked up Cole from school for the first round of soccer tryouts. When they came home, they were both high on how well the tryouts went. The second round of tryouts was the next night, and both of them were certain Cole would nail a spot on the team.  Joe never made it to soccer tryouts the next night. I thought we processed all the sad memories. Nope. (P. S. Cole did make the team)

Ten years ago, Cole was a newly minted teen. He grew up. He grew up good.  I’m so proud of him and I miss sharing that pride with Joe. Cole wishes for more shared experiences with his dad. Me too.

Do you think it is as hard for a child to lose a parent at an early age as it is for a parent to lose a child?

In the early days, I saw Joe everywhere. I spoke to Joe all the time. There is no shortage of people to suggest that Joe is watching over us and is proud of us. I am sure I told Cole that his dad was watching and cheering him on during the second round of soccer tryouts. Divine Intervention! When soccer fell apart a few months later was that Divine Intervention too? Having a relationship with a dead person is complicated.

Ten years later, I’ve stopped asking Joe for messages and signs from the beyond. These days it’s enough to see or hear something that reminds me of Joe and make that connection myself.  Sometimes I share those connections with Cole. Sometimes he shares them with me.

Cole just walked in from his Adult soccer game. His team won 4-2, and as the goalie, he made a few good saves. They haven’t been on a winning streak. Ten years later, I won’t call it divine intervention. I’ll call it grace and soccer skill.

Odd Loves Company!