Dear Mrs. Brennan,
Thank you for your comment. I posted it on Facebook and a lot of my friends did a wonderful job answering you, but I thought it was interesting enough to warrant its own Odd blog post.
Let’s tackle the first part of your question. What gives me the RIGHT to channel my dead husband? Well first, my mom and Carolee said I could. But maybe the “right” answer is that, more often than not, Joe just shows up, invited or not, and I am open to his visits. Most of the time, I welcome them. It’s not much different than having a good friend drop by when they are in the neighborhood – except Joe is dead. That is what bothers you right, Mrs. Brennan? The dead part? If Joe were alive, it would be ok if we talked, after all we were married and had a kid. But when someone dies, you have to be special to talk to them; you have to have the correct tools to conjure them up, and as far as you know the only conjuring tool I might own is an ice cream scoop, which by the way Mrs. Brennan, works like a charm.
Although I reserve the right to someday pull out my crystal ball, black tablecloth, and candles and invite my friends over while I try to summon up Joe, I don’t think under those circumstances there is enough Bombay Vodka, chocolate, or ice cream in the world to bring him forth. Even if I blast The Doors really loudly as we all held hands chanting, “Joey, Joey, Joey,” he hated sit downs and meetings. Now, if we invited Rachel’s friend, the Tantra sex teacher, we might have a chance. Hmm… now that’s a thought. (Note to self: Ask Joe if he will appear at a séance in his honor if it is held immediately following a Tantra Sex workshop.)
The second part of your question asks about my channeling credentials. I wish you had left me a clue as to what channeling credentials I needed. In Chicago, you need a permit for everything, so perhaps I am in violation of a city code which prevents channeling dead spouses without a permit. I will check with the Department of Channeling first thing tomorrow. Perhaps I am lacking in the area of education. Damn, I had been meaning to sign up for Channeling Dead Husbands 101. See what happens when you put things off?
Perhaps the credentials you are wondering about are spiritual. Maybe I’m not holy enough, reverent enough, or my OHHHHHM is lacking. My eyes only glass over when Cole reads me recipes one line at a time. If it counts at all, I’m a big fan of Shirley MacLaine. Oh wait, just one minute … I send my child to a Waldorf school, I have sat through many Eurythmy performances, and can say the word Anthroposophy. Spiritual credentials confirmed.
Mrs. Brennan, who are you? In my mind, you are a short woman wearing an odd hat. Your finger is constantly in point mode. Perhaps you sell your channeling skills or e-book and are threatened that I could soon throw up a sign reading “Sister Katybeth – I channel your way.” Or worse yet, maybe you are afraid I will share the channeling secret with my Odd readers. Channeling is not an art, a gift, or even special. It does not require credentials, and it is always our right. Channeling is a willingness to initiate a conversation and answer back, Right Joe?
“Right, Babe. By the way, Mrs. Brennan, you’re a dumbass.”
Glad you were in my Odd neighborhood. Feel free to drop by any time. Odd Loves Company and odd loves you and you and you!! I would love to hear from you in the comment section of this blog, or on Facebook or Twitter!