Flip Flops and Wicked Witches

Odd Random Reviews hit a road block at the end of the May when my teen’s senior play consumed my life. Creating a graduation slide show took up where the play left off, and in June, I was buried in a flurry of graduation activities. And when it was all said and done, my get up and go was gone and I suffered a severe case of lazy bones. However, I am a finisher and committed to letting no item go unreviewed, having our Odd drawing, and sending my reviewers a small token of my undying love and appreciation. In other words, my get up and go has returned and we are going to wrap up Odd Reviews.

The first review is of a pair of Carly’s flip flops. Did you know that flip flops are the oldest form of footwear known to man! There are cave paintings showing prehistoric man sporting flip flops, or as they were silently called back then, toe thongs. The styles varied from civilization to civilization. Greek thongs made use of the big toe; Roman thongs, the second toe; and Mesopotamian thongs, the third toe! Centuries later, they were given the name flip-flaps, and they started to appear in America after World War II when soldiers brought Japanese “zori” (their word for flip flops) back from the war, as souvenirs. American’s flipped out over the casual footwear and gave them their new name—flip flops. Today global flip flop sales rack up 20 billion dollars annually and beat out the sneaker market.

The second review is of my dear Aunt Jill’s witch. I forgot to ask her witch which this one was (she collects witches), but I believe this witch was gifted to her by her daughter, my dear Cousin Carla. My mother collected unicorns (for years, but not any more), and her sister collects witches. I told you from the start that my family was Odder than your family, and trust me, we really haven’t even scratched the surface. But never mind, let’s find out what our reviewers have to say about Auntie’s Witchy Poo and Flip Flops

Submitted By: Carly

Reviewed By: Floppy Jane 

Flip flops! It had to be flip flops! I feel like I have been transported to last year’s shoe reviews. Wearer beware. I figure that we all know what a gateway drug is (you know, those drugs that seem harmless but actually lead the user to experiment with harder and more harmful drugs). That is what Flip Flops are! First, you buy a pair to wear to the beach (where they belong). Within a week or so, you begin to slip them on to run out to get gas in the car or out to check the mail. Pretty soon, you are wearing Flip Flops out to the grocery store, to the movies, and to restaurants. All of your cute sandals are sitting in the back of the closet because these flip flops have taken up residence right by the front door where they are so convenient to slip on as you leave. You must stop and get a hold of yourself! If you don’t, you’ll soon be wearing flip flops to work and to church, and, if you’re not careful, you will soon be trying to get away with wearing them to weddings and semi-formal events. Please believe me, no matter how many rhinestones, animal prints, or furs you put on them, flip flops are still only appropriate for the beach, a picnic in the park, or in your own home or yard. If these are the things that represent you best, I’m hoping it is because they represent summer and that you are a sunshine girl, not because your life is slipping away.

PS – Northern people know that flip flops are the gateway shoes of the south, but before you start feeling superior, look in your closet or by your front door and see if there is a pair of Uggs there. If there is, you are in just as much trouble. Uggs are the gateway shoe of the north.

Reviewed By: Bella La Toe

It’s all about the pedi. Do you see the perfectly painted red toes? I read somewhere that girls who wear bright colors on their toes are fun and that they passionately own their sexuality. Face it, you’re a foot flirt. You hook the object of your desire with your red toes, and flip those flats off and flop down on a beach blanket to play a little footsie! You go girl!

Submitted By: Jill

Reviewed By: Angelique Bouchard

There once was a witch named Ruth,​
Who was always a tad uncouth.​
While starting some trouble,​
She stepped in a puddle,​
Causing her to go ‘poof’.​

Let me guess, this person is not a fan of the Wizard of Oz. She is certain the witch got the raw end of the broom. Dorothy was a whiny brat and her friends were needy. And don’t get her started on Glinda! Suffice to say the wrong witch died. This looks like a grandmother witch that was a little heavy handed with the blush and eyebrow pencil. She is either smiling or smirking. Perhaps she just ate the candy snatching kids and feels smug about it. The witch collector (assuming she has more than one) wants us all to give witches a chance and to stop assuming that the witch is the antagonist. The Witch of the West just wanted to take Toto for a ride on her broom and had no intention of feeding him to the flying monkeys. Hansel and Gretel were trespassing and nibbling on the poor misunderstood witch’s house, and if she didn’t teach them that this was wrong, who would? Clearly not their parents. I believe that the person who submitted this over-blushed witch as one of her favorite things wants all of us to find a new appreciation for witches and to stop kissing toads and princesses and let her do her job.

Reviewed By: Penelope Clearwater

Witches conjure up so many images. There is the evil queen, carrying her basket of poisoned apples to innocent Snow White; the Wicked Witch of the West, flying on her broomstick, with her winged monkeys, chasing Dorothy and her friends (Tin Woodman, the Cowardly Lion, Scarecrow, and little Toto), and the squinty-eyed old woman of Hansel and Gretel, heating up her black oven and preparing to eat the candy-fattened children. But I don’t think any of those images are likely to represent the personality of the person who shared this witch. This witch looks like a good witch with a mischievous gleam in her eyes. “Ha,” she says, “they will never figure me out.” Which leads me to believe that this person is full of contradictions. Cautious and free-spirited, kind and thorny, practical and impulsive, friendly and reserved, clever and honest. I bet she is slow to anger but doesn’t forgive quickly or easily and is very loyal to those she considers part of her coven. I’ll sum up my observations by saying that this person is a little wicked—but in a good way.

#

Thank you reviewers and submitters. This wraps up this years Odd Reviews. You all were marvelous, fabulous, funny, insightful and most of all patient. I promise next years reviews will flow in a more timely fashion. I will tally the comments from all the reviews (including this one) and we will have our gift card drawing and announce the winner on Friday, July 4th. My reviewer sussies* will ship out sometime next week.

Don’t forget to leave a comment for the chance to win a random gift card for a random amount.

Odd Loves Company,

 

* A sussie is what my Odd family calls a small, but delightful surprise gift. Maybe, someone else called it that first, but I claim it as our word. 

Random Review 1: Jar opener and Laptop

Random Review 2: Mugs and Thieves

Random Review 3: Coffee and Nicho

Random Review 4: Golden Ring and Ancestry

Random Review 5: Cooking Pot  and Nuwave

Random Review 6: Prayer Wheels and Artist

Random Review 7: Boombox and Bear

Random Review 8: IPhones and Party Shoes